A Parent's Grief

 

There are many resources and organizations to assist bereaved parents and family members such as siblings and grandparents.  It is our desire to make these easily accessible to you as you seek out information concerning parental grief.  One of the most widely known organizations is 
The Compassionate Friends, and we highly recommend this group of volunteers.  The members are bereaved parents who volunteer tirelessly in order to help others facing the same type of loss.  There are local chapters in Fayetteville and in Wake County.  We can assist you in finding out more information about upcoming meetings and resources available from these local chapters.

The Grief Resources Library at O'Quinn-Peebles has books available for you to check out and read at your own pace and in the privacy of your home along with Various Articles available on our web-site.  There are several web-sites dedicated to helping families that have lost a child, and we have their links available to you at our Online Resources page.  If you should find a site that is particularly helpful to you and it is not listed on our site, please let us know so that we may share it with others.

No matter what others may say or what you might expect of yourself, grief is as individual as the person grieving.  There is no wrong way to grieve, and no standard that you have to match in order to be grieving "properly".  While each person expresses their grief in unique ways, there are some feelings that many parents experience:

  • Shock - shock shuts the body down and makes everything numb

  • Anguish - unexpected moments when the pain rises up

  • Rage - violent and explosive anger

  • Anger - less intense and more manageable than rage but a strong emotion

  • Blame - seeking out a guilty party either real or imagined

  • Fear - uncertainty over what lies ahead for self and family

  • Guilt - blaming one's self with thoughts of "what if I had....."

  • Suicidal Thoughts - common in bereaved parents, but the parent should seek out an understanding spouse or friend to share these thoughts with.  

Grief is not only a mental and an emotional pain, but it also involves physical pain.  A bereaved person is often forgetful, suffers from insomnia, eating or digestion difficulties and other physical ailments.  While these and other physical problems may be frustrating, the parent must remember that their body will need time to recover from the nightmare forced upon them.  One of the best things a bereaved parent can do for is find support of some type.  A spouse is not always the best source of support as they are also grieving and may not be capable to offer the needed support.  A non-judgmental friend that is available at any hour to offer a listening ear or shoulder to cry on is a valuable anchor in stormy seas.

Really Listening to Bereaved Parents and Siblings

 

Brochures provided by The Compassionate Friends:

Surviving Your Child's Suicide

Understanding Grief When A Child Dies

Caring For Surviving Children


These are a few of the brochures provided by The Compassionate Friends.  We have these brochures available at the funeral home, and would be glad to mail them out if requested.  Just call or email us using the link below and let us know which titles you would like.

 

 

O'Quinn-Peebles Funeral Home, Inc.     1310 South Main Street, PO Box 266, Lillington, North Carolina 27546     910-893-3232      FAX 910-893-3296

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