Immediately following the death of a loved one, most
people are faced with one stressful situation after another. Family
members who may have difficulty getting along under the best of
circumstances are often required to work together, confronted by countless
decisions carrying enormous emotional weight.
Fight or flight is the automatic human response to a
stressful situation, but grieving a loss is often a prolonged process,
lasting months and often years. While our bodies may have difficulty
coping with the ongoing stress, it is possible to handle the stress in
ways that contribute to you overall well-being.
DON探 GO IT ALONE. Independence is highly valued in
our culture, and many of us have internalized it to the point where we
miss opportunities to lean on others, even when we need to the most.
LET OTHERS DO FOR YOU. Friends are often happy to help
in practical ways like running errands, cooking meals or listening. Talk
out your grief with trusted friends and pastors or join a support group if
you find that sharing and hearing from others is a source of comfort and
strength for you. Let yourself be hugged and held by friends and family.
Observing young people responding to tragedy can teach adults a lot about
the power of a touch or an embrace.
TAKE CARE OF YOUR BODY. Under periods of prolonged
stress, the human body becomes more susceptible to illness. Difficulty
sleeping, loss of appetite, and lack of adequate exercise make this a
difficult time for many people. AT a time in your life when you probably
fell the least motivation or interest, it becomes even more important than
usual to take good care of that body of yours.
GIVE YOURSELF SMALL KINDNESSES. Although it may seem
trivial, small things like a massage, prayer, finding a creative outlet,
or even keeping fresh flowers around the house can ease the way for your
body and spirit on this journey of grief.
BE GENTLE WITH YOURSELF. Change is always stressful.
When you have lost someone you love, your life is changed forever. Be
patient with yourself during this strenuous time. You need time and space
to take it all in and to let go of what no longer serves you in your new
life.
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This is an excerpt from the Care Notes Booklet
"Dealing With the Stress That Grief Brings"
And is reprinted with permission of the publisher.
To request a copy, call 893-3232